So somehow I feel obligated to reply to this. I tag no one because I don’t believe in that viral coercion-voodoo bad luck garbage if you don’t pass ______ on

1. At what age do you wish to marry?
Eh, age is not as important as when God (and wife to be) feels my character is ready.

I would prefer mid to late 20’s. Around grad schoolish.

2. What will you do when you feel really emo?

mm…write. Angry music, and lately make someone else miserable by complaining to them. Gym’s too far away for such frivolous expenditures

3. Who is your idol?

By “idol” I assume you mean person I admire or person I want to be just like?

Well, I admire a lot of people (Pete & Ray to name a few) but, being human, flawed as well. They tend to lose demi-god/idol status the closer you get to them and see their flaws so I’ve stopped believing in “idols” but instead role models.

So I have no (human) idols. I have enough flaws of my own. I don’t need to go around trying to pick up other people’s flaws as well.

4. Where is the place that you want to go most?
Heaven. 2nd place: where I’m wanted/needed. 3rd place: Meaningful fellowship with (Christian) friends

5. If you have one dream to come true, what would it be?

To have complete peace for my weary soul

6. What is the purpose of your life?
General, overarching purpose as a Christian: to glorify God with who I am. Personally, creativity, passion, innovation, profoundness have to be in there somewhere. Fire too probably.

7. What are you afraid to lose the most right now?

I’m not afraid of losing the thing itself but losing it’s effect and relevance: Christ in me. Ways that Christ lives in me: What remains of my inner fire, resolve, integrity and character.

8. What cheers you up for the rest of the day?

Being appreciated. Not just an obligatory “thanks” but “I praise God for your presence in my life.” And not having to ask for it.

Getting something meaningful accomplished.

An undeniable encounter with God in a “coincidence,” presence, etc.

9. If you meet someone you love, would you confess to him/her?

I would initially be silent in an attempt to ascertain 1)If I truly loved her (which I highly doubt if I had just met her) 2) (But suppose it was) If it was mutual b/c love is not one-sided. I’d like to say right now that I’d be able to at least talk it over. All in all though, it’s a decision and a commitment (love that is).

10. List out three good things of the person who tagged you.

Meticulous to a fault. Perceptive of one’s emotional state. Genuine. You too have been to the dark side and back and though you struggle, you maintain an optimistic outlook. More than I can say at times.

11. What type of person do you hate the most?

In my more petty moments…Apathetic people. Mentally lazy people. Ludicrously lazy people. Greedy materialistic shallow people. Basically shallow empty shells of people. Unfulfilled potential? I guess as an engineer I hate waste.

12. What would you do if you won a million dollars?

A million? mm… honestly, I don’t know how I wouldn’t splurge a little on some things. Books, a better work setup, my own library room and a music room. Not sure what but useful things for sure.

I don’t give a lot of thought to such questions because a million that just pops out of nowhere and comes my way? highly unlikely. There are far luckier people than me.

I’d like to say I’d live without the vast majority of it but I’m sure that’s being completely honest with myself. One thing’s for sure though: money does not bring fulfillment or happiness. God does.

13. What is your ambition?

To be everything that I was created to be. To strive for excellence, not just to get by. To be an upstanding testimony to my future household, church and nonchristians. To be a wise father and a thoughtful husband and an above-and-beyond worker. Not a lofty goal at all. It’s overwhelming sometimes when I think of all that I’ve been called to not only do but do to the best of my ability

Right now, my ambition is to get back that drive to strive towards those eternal things, treasure in heaven and a life of virtue.

14. What will you do if you got rejected by someone you like?

See #2. If it was early (which I assume because I won’t dawdle with DTR), I doubt I would let myself get attached too much or at least that’s what I would tell myself I think. Yes, I actually have emotions. Gasp.

15. If you have a chance, which part of your character would you like to change?

To truly shed my dark heavy cynicism. but not only to “change” it but to have a reason to believe in mankind and the efficacy of my actions again.

Clarification (05.14.08 )

I say this because when I find the world to be depraved and my effort meaningless, this tends to hamper even the chance of my efforts being effective. Self pity is a self-fulfilling prophesy.

16. What is your favorite color?

Changes according to my mood. Most colors can be nice given the right context. Right now I’m feeling a steel grey blue.

17. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?

The hope of salvation. Loss of hope is the only thing worse than death.

18. If there’s one thing in your life you want to do but yet unable to, what would it be?

To live free of imprisonment (different from consideration) of other people’s impressions of me.

19. What would you do if tomorrow was the last day of the world?

If everyone knew it or just me? If everyone, I would be torn between quiet reflection then thoughtful action, spending time with those I care about most, or maybe some selective witnessing. I say selective because people would be sick of being beaten over the head and wouldn’t listen. I know everything for the gospel. I’m just being honest in what I would probably end up doing.

In complete honesty though, some days though I think I’m sufficiently angry at the world to go “now it’s my turn” and go to sleep. I’m so tired.

20. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?

Christian is a must. Not just Christian by name either. A growing Christian. Upstanding character and a desire to improve as we’re never going to be perfect. A spirit that reflects some character of Christ. Gentle, encouraging, exhorting, humorous, quirky. Those are all good. Remember kids, “You love a girl not in spite of her quirks but because of them.”

A mind that wishes to learn. This is more important than intelligence. An inquisitive mind. Appreciates me? That’s a given I’m sure. Patience is probably always a good thing to have in things like this. Good time management because sometimes I expend too much time and effort on small things. Like this. Freakin’ essays answers to each question. I can’t believe this took 90 minutes to think, write and now clean up the html. Argh.

[Update: 10-2-08 ] A lot more time than 90 minutes by now…more like 120-150 by now I’m sure: adding those updates and refining the wording.

Preferably similar or at least compatible values.

Bonus points if you’re Taiwanese. Double if you can speak Taiwanese too. Nope that wasn’t shallow at all (innocent look).

On another note, physical appearance is not as important. Spirit and character is more than sufficient to make up for it. Physical attraction will follow but not the other way around. This quote comes to mind:

“The more you get to know a person, the more attractive they become to you.
Because everything beautiful you see on the inside of them, suddenly you’re able to see on the outside of them too.”


[Update:9-29-08 ]

A woman who can raise and teach her children in the Lord.

Someone who takes care of themselves in all regards. Note: Obsess is not the same as taking care of yourself.

Example: I find a woman who eats unhealthily (as a tendency, not necessarily a sporadic can’t-be-helped occurrences) to be in contempt for her body which will carry her children. Another easy example is a smoker. Things like that betray a selfish woman who lacks implementing long term goals in the everyday sense. In other words, aiming for something and doing nothing to work towards is. Or at least a woman who doesn’t think enough for something like that to cross their minds. At least then be willing to be open to correction and ready to strive towards being like Christ and managing everything (that is His) for His greatest glory.

[Update: 10-2-08 ]

Someone who doesn’t put a lot of emphasis or whine about the giving of regular gifts. Basically, making gifts (especially the purchased variety) a component of the relationship. Makes me think that the relationships is going to be a cash-based one…bad. (An excellent article on why that is)

This is getting to be really long. Almost enough for it’s own post. Certainly could develop into a series. Desiring a Godly mate. and then of course, what is a Godly man, a Godly woman.

I tag no one. So that’s my one and a half cents. Feel free to take the questions and go for it if you so feel inclined.